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Monday, April 11
Americans are stupid

And here's why:

(this should incite some angry comments from my fellow across-the-oceaners)

American gas (PETROL!) prices are low! REALLY low! Cheapest in the world, for sure... (right there's the Google keywords typed out) They complain about petrol prices (no, we don't call it gasoline. Stupid name. Petrol..eum, ok? Ok.) Right, I should've annoyed some people already.

Here's why they're wrong to complain: last week (week beginning 4th of April 2005), petrol prices began to rise AGAIN, almost in perfect sync with the Chancellor of the Exchequer announcing the new Budget. Price went up several pence per litre, unleaded is now 86.9p/litre here, and diesel is pushing 91p/litre. It'll probably go up as well.


Now then... The Americans (least the ones I've talked to) all complain bitterly about how expensive petrol is. So let's do some sums...

Step 1: Ask Google... "1 gallon in litres"

Google obediently replies:
1 US gallon = 3.7854118 litres


Ok. So, let's round that off to 3.8litres... Now then, let's go and consult this web site I found, SpringfieldGasPrices.com. I guess it's as random an average sample of US petrol prices as you could get anywhere. So, using this site as a base, we can do some quick conversions using X-Rates.com for the £/$ conversions. The most expensive price listed on the Springfield site as of right now (11th of April, 2005) is $2.29/gallon (not litre, note this is important).

Let's do some quick conversions... $2.29 = £1.22016 GBP (according to the current exchange rate of about $1.88 to Ã?£1 (foreign recession = goooood... Guess who bought their dollars for their summer holiday recently ;).


Right. So, it's costing the Americans £1.22 a gallon to fill up their cars. As it's costing us Brits 87p a litre, let's multiply that by 3.8 to get the per-gallon cost... That's £3.31 a gallon, or $6.21221 a gallon in greenbacks.


NOW complain about how expensive your petrol prices are. Or, mums of America (if you can), stop driving round those stupid people carriers when all you're doing is taking your kids to school. What is it with America and their fascination with those great huge hulking vans that are seemingly so popular?

Oh, also... Has anybody ever mentioned the word VTec (no, not the kid's toy manufacturer, the method of making EFFICIENT petrol engines that don't need solid fuel rocket booster stages to give them enough juice to get from A to B... The Japs bought the design from the Brit who invented it, clever dude.) Even one of our humble British cars with a 2litre engine could most probably easily outpace a 3 or 4 litre American car with ease.


Oh, and please get your president (note: lowercase P) to sign up to the Kyoto Treaty, before all your country's CO2 emissions from all the inefficient engines (without catalytic converters, too) kill us all. Pretty please? Do it for the rest of the world if not just for me. Thanks. I mean for christ's sake, our 4-stroke petrol lawn mower puts out more emissions than my 1390cc car (it's a Clio, you should try getting insurance on a car with any larger engine size over here - you have to insure the car, not the driver in this country, and they hit you hard).


When I go to America, remind me to take some jerry cans with me, fill em up at the local petrol station and FedEx them back to my house... Probably still work out cheaper even after shipping costs. :D

(Woo! I love return-ranting (can you tell that this whole thing about the Americans complaining about petrol prices has been on my nerves for a LONG time.)



Ok................... I now await the irate comments from the Americans (/me hopes Google will index this page nicely) :D :D :D :D


Dragged out of Christopher's memory and pasted
into his blog at 4/11/2005 11:13:00 PM. Roughly.
Blog ID: 111325876046212653·
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